People waste their time pondering whether a glass is half empty or half full. Me, I just drink whatever’s in the glass.
Sophia (Estelle Getty)
My mother used to say: The older you get, the better you get. Unless you’re a banana.
Rose (Betty White)
No matter how bad things get, remember these sage words: You’re old, you sag, get over it.
Sophia (Estelle Getty)
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You know what they say: You can lead a herring to water, but you have to walk really fast or he’ll die.
Rose (Betty White)
You know my motto. Today could be the last day of your life.
Sophia (Estelle Getty)
The bottom line is, in life, sometimes good things happen, sometimes bad things happen. But honey, if you don’t take a chance, nothing happens.
Dorothy (Bea Arthur)
Everyone wants someone to grow old with, and shouldn’t everyone have that chance?
Sophia (Estelle Getty)
How come whenever my ship comes in it’s leaking?
Dorothy (Bea Arthur)
Why do blessings wear disguises? If I were a blessing, I’d run around naked.
Sophia (Estelle Getty)
I eat raw cookie dough. And occasionally, I run through the sprinklers and don’t wear a bathing cap. And at Christmas, I’ve been known to put away more than one eggnog.
Rose (Betty White)
Look, you didn’t ask me for my opinion, but I’m old, so I’m giving it anyway.
Sophia (Estelle Getty)